The Ravens Wanted Better for David Archuleta

Editorial Staff

To no one’s surprise, David Cook won American Idol last night. To my surprise, some Baltimore Ravens players disagreed with the outcome.

“I think that David Cook will be more successful, period,” said long-snapper Matt Katula with a laugh. “But, judging by Tuesday’s show, there was no question that David Archuleta was going to win. It was pretty interesting to see Cook take the win, but Archuleta has some pipes. He’s like the reincarnation of Clay Aiken.

Well, at least you know the Ravens are as secure a bunch of guys as you’ll find. Not only do they claim allegiance to the American Idol brand, but they aren’t afraid to invoke the name of Clay Aiken. In a positive way, at that.

“He has a good voice, but he’s a one-trick pony,” Sypniewski said. “All he sings are ballads. He tried to sing some Chris Brown song two weeks ago, and he sounded pretty bad.

Who needs Simon Cowell? Just throw our boy Quinn Sypniewski out there and he’ll give it to you raw and real. I mean, how can more than 50 percent of 97 million voters be wrong? Hard to say, but I guarantee you none of those voters want to hold up a David Cook sign this season at M and T Bank Stadium.

Besides, everyone knows Syesha Mercado rocks the hardest.